The Third Wheel

No matter your age, going on a date always required a sibling to tag along.  Any Hmong person will tell you that.  I wonder what the point of it all is.  My parents always said it's so that nothing "forbidden" would happen, and to stop anything that would bring "shame" to the family.

Analyzing the idea, it must runs deeper than what they told me.  These days, relationships are starting at younger ages.  Sometimes those relationships are abusive.  The sibling could be there to maybe warn the parents about it, or even convince their sister/brother to end the relationship.   It would definitely save the heartache of going through an abusive relationship.

I've only been the third wheel once.  My sister and I sat there watching Titanic while her date cried at the part where Rose lets Jack sink into the ocean.  We looked at him, looked at each other .. and wanted to laugh, but didn't.  It's still a memory we both giggle at when we chit chat.  I didn't mind being the third wheel.  Heck, I got to watch Titanic for free.

Hmong American

Being Hmong American, I am torn between being "too American", or being "fobby".  But what do those terms really mean?  I suppose it would depend on the individual.  I speak my native language fluently, and yet still have a hard time conversing with the elders.  I listen to Hmong music, and am asked to why I listen to it. 

As I have grown older, and am now living away from my mother, I have found myself grasping at my ethnic roots.  I've been seeking clothes, music, food, anything and everything that would make me feel more "hmong". It's something I never thought would be comforting, but it actually is.  It cures my feelings of being homesick.